Infidelity is sometimes a taboo subject that is difficult to talk about. And yet, it doesn’t only happen to others. When it happens to us, between sadness and anger, we don’t always know how to react. We wonder then if we will have enough strength to forgive our spouse for his infidelity… How to overcome this ordeal?
Infidelity is the main cause of breakups in couples. Indeed, discovering that one’s partner had an affair is very painful. This discovery calls into question an important thing in a couple: trust. Mutual trust is the very basis of a couple’s solidity. At first glance, infidelity is something unacceptable and above all unforgivable for the person who is subjected to it.
After the discovery, a crisis often follows, the outcome of which is uncertain for the couple, nevertheless, it acts most of the time as a revelation. Before even thinking about breaking up or reconciling, it is important to give yourself time to digest this shock, to let your sadness and anger out. Also, it is absolutely necessary to put aside your desire for revenge because the situation will only get worse and it will not take away your sadness.
After the infidelity
Afterwards, it is important to understand what is behind the adultery. As we mentioned above, an infidelity is often the revelation of a heavier problem: routine that has set in, frustrations, doubts and fears, lack of attention… If you want to have a chance to overcome this ordeal and save your relationship, it will be necessary that the « unfaithful » clearly exposes the real reasons for his infidelity, so that together, you can find solutions and continue your story on new bases. You will take the opportunity to re-establish communication with your spouse. Infidelity can save some couples. It can be synonymous with crisis and estrangement before becoming synonymous with a new chance.
If there are still feelings, forgiveness is allowed. However, there must be, on both sides, the energy, the desire and especially the trust necessary to stay together. It is precisely this trust that will be the most difficult thing to regain. For the person who has been cheated on, it will first be necessary to regain self-confidence, since after an infidelity, one often doubts oneself. Confidence is not easily regained, it will be necessary to be patient. For the unfaithful person, it will be necessary to accept that forgiveness is not necessarily immediate.
